“Defiantly Going Back”

Have a look at these reviews:

“Best all inclusive hotel we have stayed in, defiantly going to return“

Review of Grand Sirenis Riviera Maya Resort, Akumal, Mexico – TripAdvisor

“Defiantly going back to Wa Kika!“

Review of Wa kika, Sayulita, Mexico – TripAdvisor

“Brilliant Hotel, would defiantly go back“

Review of Aspect Hotel Parkwest, Clondalkin, Ireland – TripAdvisor

“Defiantly Going Back“

Review of Kristalli Hotel Apartments, Malia, Greece – TripAdvisor

So much rage!

What is it with people who post reviews on TripAdvisor? It doesn’t take much effort to search and find posts like the examples above. Which tells me there must be literally thousands of ‘Trip Advisors’ around the world who have visited beautiful resorts and hotels but have overstayed their welcomes and offended their hosts. And it started out so well.

Let me paint the picture.

It starts at the end of the vacation, with a conversation in the lobby with the concerned concierge. Everyone is calm to begin with, speaking in hushed tones, neither party wanting to make a scene. But these sorts of things always escalate until everyone in the lobby, or on the street walking around you and your tossed luggage, can’t help but hear every word.

Concierge: “Don’t come back now, you hear? You’re not welcome.”

Tourist: “But, you’re the best all-inclusive hotel we have ever stayed in. We were planning on returning next year.”

Concierge: “I don’t care. We don’t want patrons like you.”

Tourist: “But—”

Concierge: “Good day, sir. I have work to do for our welcome guests.”

(Why did he have to italicise ‘welcome’?)

Tourist: “Kids, grab your bags out of the gutter. We’re out of here, and we’re never coming back!”

But something happens between that parting shot and the TripAdvisor post.

Do these people let it fester until they finally reach home, or do they make use of the free wi-fi still available outside the resort to make their TripAdvisor post in the heat of the moment?

However long it takes, the thought process seems to go something like this: “I don’t care what she says, we’re going back there next year! And I’m going to post it for all the world to see. She won’t be able to stop us from returning.”

I think I’ve just answered my own question about why TripAdvisor travellers are so adamant about signalling their intentions, against the wishes of hotel management. It’s a kind of name-and-shame revenge on the person who kicked them out.

I don’t know what these travellers do that gets them kicked out, but they don’t seem to take ownership of their poor behaviour. They are so… defiant!

Defiantly not!

Then there are the strangely vindictive travellers who have enjoyed themselves, haven’t been kicked out of a given restaurant or hotel, but who ‘would defiantly not recommend Tony Resort to other guests because…’ well, I honestly think it’s because they’re just mean-spirited.

I mean, if you enjoyed the experience, and you’ve taken the time to post on TripAdvisor, why wouldn’t you just recommend the place?

The other possibility is that perhaps the person feels so strongly that a fellow-traveller should create their own holiday experience, rather than base it on the recommendations of others, that they go out of their way to not recommend a place.

An ODD example

One more example, and this is just weird – it’s odd, even. A woman goes to a new hair salon and comes out with a disaster of a hairdo. What does she do?

“I am defiantly going back”

http://www.northridgehair.com/testimonial-post/i-am-defiantly-going-back

What?

Why? I don’t understand.

So, I decided to do some research into the phenomenon. There’s a name for it: Oppositional Definite Disorder (ODD). It’s a behaviour disorder. Look it up for yourself. This is how they define it:

When the word ‘definite’ would have been a better choice, but you don’t care. You’re going to use ‘defiant’ instead, and they can all go to hello. 

The last word in that definition is a joke about autocorrect. If you consider autocorrect to be a suitable substitute for a proofreader, please contact me before you submit your next document anywhere. To anybody.

Including TripAdvisor.